September 28, 2018
I went on a date with a guy who was super cool and the date was awesome! We went to one of my favorite restaurants and enjoyed each other’s company. While we talked, we discovered we were both in the military and we were actually going to be at the same place the following day. Guys… I was fineee when I went on this date. I mean, I think I’m always fine but I looked great. I had my inches (weave), my face was beat to the gawdsss, my nails were done, and I wore a super cute dress. Who doesn’t go on a date looking their best?? Lol
So yea, the military training the following day was around 7am. Keep in mind; I’ve been to this military event numerous times during my military career. The next day I was at drill with my natural hair pulled back in a bun, I didn’t have any makeup on, the nails were off, and of course I was in my military uniform. I ended up running into the guy while I was at the event and he immediately cocked his head back and started acting awkward. I felt the energy and it was all off. I never had anyone act like that towards me. Therefore, I just laughed it off and acted as if I didn’t notice his reaction. We talked for a little but the conversation was cut very short.
Through that encounter, I concluded, maybe I should’ve kept my weave in and put makeup on that morning because I couldn’t think of any other reason why he reacted to me like that. From that moment, I decided to make sure I always looked bomb when I left the house! I didn’t care where I was going. I could be going to a high-class event or Publix. No one was ever going to catch me slipping again! lol
Well the other day I was talking to my friend and she literally said, “Bless he was a dirt bag and it’s not your responsibility to look good to make others feel comfortable around you. No matter who it is!”
I’ll be honest, I knew he was being very shallow and allowed his perception of me change my ideas on how I should look.
Sometimes understanding the American culture on dating is tricky. Many people say they want to be with someone that’s natural, cool, and fun to be around, but that’s not necessarily the truth. Most people want someone that is eye catching to everyone and sometimes it’s expected to be that way all the time. In reality, would you really like that person if they decided to strip their adornments? Would you really want to get to know that person without it? On the other hand, do you just want what they could give you physically? Do you just want their outward beauty to compliment yours?
While meditating on this topic I thought about how I treat my relationship with God. Sometimes some of us wear makeup when it comes to our relationship with God by filling our schedules with numerous church service activities but we don’t actually have a true intimate relationship with Him. We wasn’t it to appear like our relationship is great but we probably don’t remember the last time we opened our Bibles or heard Him speak to us.
Meanwhile, God never has to get to know us like other humans because he knew us before we were even thought of. Some of us may feel like we HAVE to wear our makeup around God because he probably will not like us otherwise. You’re identity is in your relationship with him. Its not wrapped up in the makeup you wear, the inches you rock, or the new shoes you just coped. If someone doesn’t love you the way God originally made you, then they just aren’t for you.
Three Lessons Learned:
1. Don’t take someone else’s preference personal!
I cannot control anyone’s attraction and that’s okay because they can’t control mine. If someone wants to be with a woman that is on 100 everyday then they can go ahead and pass me up because that’s definitely not the case for me!
2. Stay true to who you are!
There’s nothing wrong with looking nice and doing things to feel beautiful but it should be my choice to do so. If I want to wear makeup daily, I can and will because I want to! Don’t let one person’s preference change who you are and what you like to do. Otherwise, you’re recreating someone’s fantasy instead of being authentically you!
3. God truly loves you for YOU!
Jeremiah 29:11 says God knew and formed me before anyone was thinking of me. The creator of the universe loves the real me. Not the person I pretend to be or the person I admire to be. He loves me. Make up on or make off. Wig on or wig off. Naturally curly hair or relaxed hair. HE. LOVES. ME. He shows me daily by how he provides in ways I can’t describe. God’s love for me is unconditional and that’s all that matters.
Thank you to my friend that made me realize that after a simple conversation! Go ahead and encourage someone today and make them feel beautiful inside and out just the way God made them!
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Until next time,
***Peace & Blessings, XOXO***